I haven’t written here recently as my children have been possessed – don’t chuff it’s true. Things got that bad that I even delved into the chocolate box and ate the other chocolate bar from one of their selection boxes and yes, before you ask, it was me that ate the other one too! Yes I’m ashamed, I stole chocolate from my children but I’ll buy them a peppa pig magazine to make up for it as I clearly can’t be trusted around chocolate!
It all began yesterday. With 1 child they may have a bad day or a series of bad days but with 2, I’m 100% convinced they compete to outdo each other! Yesterday one wanted crisps, I gave her crisps, she didn’t want the crisps. I offered her another snack, she wanted to choose one for herself. Great. independence! She choose her snack without incident (brilliant), opened her snack with perfection, took a large bite of her snack, then put said snack back …… Wait I thought you wanted that? You chose it with determination and ownership! No, she wants crisps! “You have to eat that now you’ve taken a bite darling” says the momma! “Aggghhhhhhhhgggggggghhhhhiiiiikkkkkkaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrraaaaaaa raaaaaaaaaa” says the ‘thing’. But ‘darling’ you can’t take snacks out of the basket, half eat them, and then put them back – it’s just not tennis! “Wwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh” replies what’s ment to be my beautiful , angelic child. After going a few rounds with this small dictator warrior, I tried again with the snacks but this time only offering a few (there was no rookie error of handing over the whole basket, and yes Mommas still make rookie errors!). ‘Jjjjaggharrrrteeeeeee’ oh wow! We’re going to need vodka for this one I don’t know about holy water! In the end she finally had some crisps (now why didn’t she just take those in the first place!) between giving me the evil eyes. “Would you like me to open that for you?” “Yes peese”. Oh good she’s back in the room! Momma opens crisps “nnnnaaaaaaaaoooooooo” and we’re back to stage 1 – because I opened the crisps! So here’s a tip for you parents out there, keep some of those plastic clips in a draw
These bad boys! I folded over the top, stuck on the clip and hay presto the exorcism was cancelled. No, postponed 😐.
Mommas A Mermaid 